My last post encouraged men to share their work details with their wives. In the process of simplifying their technical work, couples bond better. Yes, I know that it is one thing for men to try and explain to their wives or carry them along as far as their work is concerned, it’s another thing for the wives to show interest in the work. It takes two willing people to make a marriage work. Madam, pls don’t fall my hand. I know you work so hard juggling many things. Take out some of the time you spend on DSTV, Netflix

One of the fastest ways to run down your marriage is to grow apart from your spouse. Simply show constant disinterest/lack of interest in your spouse’s work and BOOM, you’ll regularly have nothing much to talk about. Let’s take the average guy for example, and even the woman who is either trying to get a business off the ground and running, or pursuing a side hustle alongside a career, and you’ll realize that work is where many spend most of their time………so, if you’re not in on what’s happening in your spouse’s work, you’re growing apart, fast! Bros, and just

For every marriage that is working, there is at least one “mumu” per time. In some cases, one person plays the mumu almost all the time. Other times, the roles change. Before you say I don’t know what i’m saying, me too I do “strong head” many times and I know where it ends. Once someone chooses to see beyond self, every issue can be solved by talking through it. When you choose to not be the “mumu” and expect your spouse to, you can win arguments, have moments to gloat and feel gratified that you did not “agree”, but

This post is not for everyone. Infact, it’s not necessarily for all married people, especially those who feel I don’t know their spouse or what he/she is capable of. This is my attempt to give counsel to someone. If it’s for you, you will know…… Dear Married Man/Woman, is there something your spouse does that you don’t like? Is there something you would like for your spouse to do, for him/herself or together with you and you’ve been talking about it for years, but nothing has changed? I have something to share with you. Stop talking about it; directly or

There’s a part of my series of live-ins that I won’t forgive myself if I don’t post. Follow me as I conclude with this important thought. Many times when we talk about married people taking in people to live with them, we make it look like the host is the saviour while the person living in is the “lesser person”. If you are thinking this way, then you are thinking short term. I want us to look at the privilege of taking in ‘angels’ just by the act of opening up our homes to some people. Can you imagine how

What happens if your live-in is becoming a threat to your home, life or marriage, and only you can see the signs? What do you do? There’s a stereotype that has been around for several years, and that’s labelling women as emotional and men as logical. While that is not the focus of today’s write up, research shows that women are more emotionally intelligent, empathic than men. Averagely, they are able to perceive, intuit, sense things faster than men. That ability however, is passive until it’s put to use and it gets even sharper. This is the basis of today’s

What if you realize that you have made a “mistake” with someone you took in to live with you? That sounds like a heavy statement. As a married person, have you ever had cause to doubt if you made the right choice in your spouse? If so, then you need to read this. If your live-in is not abusing your children, stealing from you, “deliberately” messing up your marriage or life, then you may need to cut him/her some slack. A full blown adult is a product of genetics, environment and upbringing, some or many of which may have been

Having people live with you means you’re making yourself “vulnerable” to them. Whereas they used to see you all dressed up and at events before they moved in with you, now they’ll see you in shorts, PJs, braless, and generally in forms that make it easy for you to be taken for granted. A wise live-in will not take things for granted. However, because we are humans and not machines, and we don’t want people walking on egg shells around us or overstepping their boundaries, it is important to have ground rules for your home. Please have no apologies for

What kind of people should you take in to live with you, especially if you have growing children in the house? A person grounded in bad vices is a “NO” (for the sake of your children, even if you can handle him/her, considering the fact that you won’t always be home to monitor what’s going on) I’m not saying you should take in a perfect person or a saint. Please find below a few very important factors for taking a person into your home. First off, it’s important that your proposed live-in demonstrates teachability a healthy level of deference/respect to

Looking at things at face value, once you have an extra room in your house and a steady stream of income, you are qualified to take people in to live in your home for a time in their lives when they need that help. But it’s deeper than extra room and regular income. Few months into a marriage, some people begin to get calls from their parents or parents-in-law to take in siblings so they can assist them; afterall, they paid their dues as parents to house and take care of them when they were still single. Some parents ask