Married Couples and their live-ins 6: Be Vigilant

What happens if your live-in is becoming a threat to your home, life or marriage, and only you can see the signs? What do you do?

There’s a stereotype that has been around for several years, and that’s labelling women as emotional and men as logical. While that is not the focus of today’s write up, research shows that women are more emotionally intelligent, empathic than men. Averagely, they are able to perceive, intuit, sense things faster than men. That ability however, is passive until it’s put to use and it gets even sharper.

This is the basis of today’s article. Today, my husband says he won’t go ahead with anything anymore except we are both aligned or on the same page about the matter. This wisdom nugget is a result of years of needless errors even though the intentions are always right.

In my previous article, i mentioned that you shouldn’t take anyone in unless you are both aligned on that decision. But what happens if after the person comes in, he/she begins to do things that threaten the peace, love and even safety of your marriage and home? This sounds too hard, right? But these things don’t look that big of a deal when you begin to see the signs. They look harmless initially and the person who notices first seems like the “paranoid” one.

Let me give an example. A couple with teenage children mutually agree to take in a young guy for a couple months before he settles and gets his own accommodation. Along the line, the guy feels at home and begins to get very friendly with all the children, especially the teenage girl. The Mother notices a few remarks, touches, winks from time to time but she decides to keep advising her daughter to be careful with men. She resorted to that because she had mentioned it to the Dad earlier who waved it off, saying it wasn’t a big deal. He said “it’s just young people pranks”.

If you were the Mum and your husband didn’t take you seriously, what would you do?

Let’s take this deeper. What if your live-in is a lady and you feel uncomfortable with the way she likes to hang around your hubby too much? How do you draw the line between paranoia, jealousy or just being wise?

Apologies people. This is where I get your thoughts. This series will be winding up with 1 or 2 articles to go. I’ll be back!